The prospect of spending a Saturday exploring the Cape Peninsula is appealing enough on its own, but even more enticing is the prospect of riding around on a vintage motorbike with a sidecar named Lolita (there's a song title in there somewhere); a celebrity dog called Brodie; and the most charming guide this side of the equator, Tim Clark. The owner of Cape Sidecar Adventures, Clark knows not only the best spot to grab fresh fish and slap chips for lunch, but also where to stop for a delectable and reviving mojito for afternoon tea. That would be true, even if the adventure started at the crack of dawn on Saturday, after a Friday night of tequilas and hours of cutting rugs on Cape Town's most vibrant dance floors.
Luckily Clark, who's seriously experienced in taking fun-loving punters on morning-after tours, has the gumption to know that 10.30am on a Saturday is a very civilised starting time. Knowing his target audience (he is, after all, the designated driver for the day), he starts the tour with a little “hair of the dog” in the form of his in-house tots of witblits offered alongside coffee and snacks.
We taste the fruits of his copper-pot stills at the Cape Sidecar Adventures depot, a vast warehouse lined with rows of Clark's BMW R75 vintage bikes and sidecars and display cabinets filled with sexy helmets and steampunk goggles. There are also leather motorcycle satchels hanging from the ceiling and covetable vintage leather racing jackets hanging in racks along a wall — we'll each be assigned one of them.
Clark is a collector who's turned his fetish into a business. He's transformed part of the space into a distillery and bar in which large jars filled with stewing fruit are displayed on shelves and the bar stools are made from old motorcycle saddles.
On a tour of the space, Clark recounts some of the history of the bikes while we check them out, noticing their names: Leo, Bubbles, Blossom, Blue Eyes, Hotstuff, Ruby and the pink one, Nellie, to name a few. “We've been going for 20 years,” says Clark. “We've taken 50,000 passengers on rides and haven't lost one yet.”
He adds, “This isn't a bike warehouse, it's an ICU — not that I'm a bike doctor or mechanic or anything. I'm actually an accountant, but I hate to count.”
Clark left South Africa in the '80s and spent 10 years in Taiwan, where he found an excess of decommissioned Chinese military bikes, designed by BMW but made in Russia (it's a long story, it's on their website). The nub of it all is that, in the 1950s, the People’s Liberation Army (PLA) of China was looking for a replacement for its obsolete army motorcycles and sidecars and was offered BMW's obsolete R71 models in exchange for goods like tonnes of apples and eggs.
The BMW R71 was a perfect solution for the army during the 50s, 60s and 70s, assisting in mobilising troops and supplies along the almost impassable farm roads in China. The Chinese renamed the bike the “Changjiang”, after the longest river in China (the Yangtze-Kiang is the third longest river in the world) and entered production in 1957 at the “China Nanchang Aircraft Manufacturing Company” not far from Beijing. Clark and Cape Sidecar Adventures acquired a whole warehouse of these classic vintage sidecars, which are practically unchanged from the 1930s. They can take a driver, one person riding pillion behind the driver and two people (or a person and a dog) in the sidecar. When hitting those beautiful Cape roads in force and numbers, they make quite a spectacle.
Before we head out on the tour, dressed up in our vintage jackets, helmets and goggles, Clark has one more thing to show us: Mrs Doubtfire, his vintage firetruck, which can seat up to 12 passengers and is equipped with a full music system. He calls this side of the business The Cape Town Fun Brigade. “I guarantee you, I can turn any adult into a 5-year-old in the back of this truck,” he says. “And that's with or without the dancing girls on the tables.”
He tells us a little history about the vehicle. “She was first called The Green Goddess, a colloquial name for the Bedford RLHZ Self Propelled Pump, a fire engine used by the UK Auxiliary Fire Service.” Everyone on the truck gets a red fireman's hat and one lucky person gets to wear the vintage fireman's jacket for the ride. “Guess who's on the logo,” says Clark.
Naturally, it's the Cape Sidecar Adventures mascot and local celebrity, Brody, a graduate of the DARG (Domestic Animal Rescue Group) dog shelter in Hout Bay. Brody is a regular sight on the Cape Peninsula roads and elicits smiles and waves wherever he goes.
BOW-WOW BIKER
Once we're on the road we can see why. People love the sight of this dapper mutt, who stands up on his hind legs in the back seat of the sidecar and faces his “begoggled” snout squarely into the wind, smiling at all the attention he gets from fellow road users.
If I'd thought Clark was charming, Brodie is irresistible, especially when, a block or two into the ride, he rests his head on the shoulder of the rider in the front of the sidecar and nuzzles in. Brodie plays his part with aplomb, looking fetching in his Rex Specs, which are dog goggles for the active hound, and sexy red bandanna.
Our first stop is a photo op with the statue of Nelson Mandela at Cape Town City Hall, but we're quickly on the road again heading towards the beach roads and gorgeous views of the Atlantic. At Maiden's Cove, we stop for a scenic pic and learn some interesting history about the beach below. It used to be one of the few beaches previously reserved for the exclusive use of the “coloured” population on the Atlantic seaboard during apartheid, and more specifically was a beach for women to use, hence the name.
On we ride, past Oudekraal Beach, where we stop for a coffee; then past Llandudno Beach community and through Hout Bay, where Clark reminds us of Brody's humble beginnings (and he barks at his friends at the dog shelter). Onwards and upwards along Chapman's Peak Drive and another great spot for a pic with our sexy male model.
It's now about 2pm and we're starving, so we decide to forgo Clark's favourite Noordhoek ice-cream stop and head to Kalk Bay for fish and chips in the harbour. Here, we meet Brody's seal friends (he once got too close to a big male and was nipped, so he now knows to keep his distance).
After lunch, it's time for Clark's best part of the day: a stop at seaside bar Cape to Cuba for the perfect mojito, in which the driver can, sadly, not indulge, having to navigate two tipsy ladies and dog back to town. He leaves us in the bar to admire the neon-lit local hangout and get lubricated before the drive back home.
Robert M Pirsig wrote about the joys of being on a motorbike in his classic philosophical treatise, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. “In a car you're always in a compartment, and because you're used to it you don't realise that through that car window everything you see is just more TV. You're a passive observer and it is all moving by you boringly in a frame. On a motorcycle, the frame is gone. You're completely in contact with it all. You're in the scene, not just watching it any more, and the sense of presence is overwhelming.”
That makes complete sense when you spend an afternoon with Clark and Brody, and from the delighted reactions from the many people who beamed and gawked at us on the spectacular Cape Peninsula roads, they wished they were in our TV show with us.
• Nagel was a guest of Cape Sidecar Adventures. For more information or to book, click here. To book Mrs Doubtfire, the party truck at the Fun Brigade, go here.
Would you like to comment on this article?
Sign up (it's quick and free) or sign in now.
Please read our Comment Policy before commenting.