Up until two months ago, Douw Steyn could be found on his stationary bike every morning — even Sundays — cycling to the sounds of Elvis.
The King of Rock n Roll was his big hero.
“He loved Elvis. I mean really LOVED Elvis Presley,” Douw's widow Carolyn told The Sunday Times this week.
“We bought some Elvis items on auction a few years ago, one of them being a glass that Elvis used to drink from. I insisted that Douw use that very glass to take his medication, saying that, in a sense, Elvis would be helping him to get well.”
A few years ago she tracked down Elvis’s Bible — complete with his handwritten notes. It was one of her husband’s most treasured gifts.
Steyn, the founder of one of the country's leading insurance groups, Auto & General, the visionary behind the iconic Steyn City lifestyle estate in Johannesburg, and a close friend of Nelson Mandela, died on Tuesday. He was 72.
Carolyn spent the last two months at her husband’s side as he lay in hospital being treated for pneumonia. He came home just after Christmas but was readmitted in January when his oxygen levels plummeted. His condition deteriorated and he was eventually put on life support. “I spent his last three nights watching over him, never leaving his side.
“At 7.18am on Tuesday, I watched the monitor next to him flatline and my world came crashing down. I lost the love of my life, someone who had been at the centre of my universe for the past 25 years.”
Steyn has been described by Mandela's assistant Zelda la Grange as somewhat of a recluse who loved to host lavish parties, who would give generous gifts to complete strangers, and leave a R10,000 tip for a waiter.
He would summon architects, builders and all manner of people to The Saxon late into the evening to present their drawings and plans, sometimes in the company of Madiba or Bill Clinton. I found myself excusing Douw’s behaviour to both presidents, thinking that all of this was impossible. But I soon learnt to never underestimate Douw Steyn
— Carolyn Steyn
The couple met at a gathering at The Saxon Hotel shortly after Carolyn had returned to South Africa from Los Angeles to take care of her mother, who had been diagnosed with terminal cancer.
They were married on her birthday, May 17, in 2003, but divorced five months later. They remarried after 10 years.
“Our favourite restaurants were San Lorenzo in London and Sale e Pepe Da Giovanni in Morningside. But Douw also loved a braai at home. And oxtail, or just meat and potatoes. We enjoyed watching movies together for days on end, and going to concerts and musicals when he was healthier.”
Soon after they remarried, Steyn began talking about his vision of a city within a city.
“I really thought he was out of his mind. He would summon architects, builders and all manner of people to The Saxon late into the evening to present their drawings and plans, sometimes in the company of Madiba or Bill Clinton. I found myself excusing Douw’s behaviour to both presidents, thinking that all of this was impossible. But I soon learnt to never underestimate Douw Steyn.”
Nestled in the middle of Steyn City, he created his dream home, Palazzo Steyn, one of the most opulent private residences in South Africa and a symbol of his ultra-luxurious vision. It was said to have cost R250m to build. While exact details of the interior remain private — marble floors, grand staircases, chandeliers and high-end finishes are all in the mix. “The great Stephen Falcke was our interior designer,” Carolyn said.
“He has done the interiors of all our homes, including the Saxon, where I lived with Douw for seven years in what is now the spa. It was once our three-bedroom apartment with a kitchen, small gym and private entrance.
“When Douw began building our new home at Steyn City, he spared no expense. We have some very special pieces, including a dining room table that Sir Winston Churchill once sat at. I love, absolutely love, our home. Living here is a privilege and a dream. It’s my happy place. It was our happy place. Music, flowers, dogs, people laughing and loyal employees who are like family to us. Our Palazzo family.”
Five years ago, when Covid hit, Palazzo Steyn literally became the entire world for the globe-trotting couple.
“Douw was vulnerable with a number of comorbidities, including type 1 diabetes, so we did everything in our power to protect him from the Covid-19 virus. Our employees were required to live in on a two-week-on, two-week-off roster and use our quarantine facility for three days, undergoing Covid testing before being allowed into our home,” Carolyn remembered.
She had a conservatory built in the garden where “Douw could feel like he was somewhere else for a bit”.
“Personally, I did not leave our home for the first 365 days of the pandemic — not to a shop, not to go to a doctor, not to a hair salon. Not even to a friend or family member’s home. I literally went nowhere; such were the strict measures we had in place to keep Douw safe from Covid. And we continued to control strict access to our home, with mandatory testing for everyone, including myself, right up until last Tuesday when he passed away.”
Towards the end of his life, Douw Steyn grew sicker.
“Douw was ill but he never lost his sense of humour ... We enjoyed sitting in our garden watching his beloved, magnificent pigeons circling above, that I always believed were putting on a show for Douw. He adored our little yorkies, BB and Blondi, and would often sneak them treats. We ate dinner together every evening — he had a strict diet, and had not consumed any alcohol for more than 13 years.”
Carolyn said when Douw got sicker, she would read to him — biographies being his favourite.
She is shattered by her husband's death. “I don’t think you are ever prepared for something like this. Douw loved South Africa — he was a man of the African soil.”
A family service was held yesterday at Steyn's beloved game farm Shambala in the Waterberg — “a place where he always found peace and solace”.
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