One of Denise Zimba’s standout roles was on the TV series The Wedding Bashers, where she stole the show with her bubbly personality while attending various fairy-tale weddings with her co-hosts.
Yet romance and marriage have caused nothing but heartbreak for the Generations actress, who recently lost custody of her two daughters after a high court battle with her estranged husband, Jakob Schlichtig.
The legal fight has left her broke, alone and heartbroken, she told the Sunday Times this week.
“I am R300,000 behind in my legal obligations. I have cleaned out my savings. Divorce is messy, especially when there are children involved, with parents from two different worlds,” she said. “I hope that we can come to a healthy resolution that is in the best interest of our children.”
Zimba said she had “fought with all my might”.
The actress met Schlichtig in Cape Town in 2015. Their first daughter was born in July 2019 and they married seven months later. In 2022 the family relocated to Munich. Their second child was born there in 2023, but Zimba filed for divorce in September that year.
Two months later, the family came to South Africa for a two-month holiday. While here, Zimba opted to not return to Germany with the children, allegeding attempted assault and infidelity.
“I did not abduct my children. We both agreed the children and I would stay in South Africa after a round table meeting with my estranged husband and my family — only for him to return to Germany and open this case. It was a shock to me and my family. My family was willing to discuss matters with his family. He said he would relay the message. That never happened.”
“I was four months post-partum and financially dependent on my estranged husband. My career had been halted for the longest time. I had to fight for my girls to remain with me, their primary caregiver, during my divorce. My girls were four years and four months at the time.”
Many women stay in marriages because they are afraid and feel powerless. Many choose to endure the pain rather than the possibility of losing their children
— Denise Zimba
But her fight was in vain. The Johannesburg high court ordered her to return her two daughters, aged one and four, to Schlichtig in Germany, saying that because the children had been living there, they had to be returned to that country.
The judgment cited The Hague Convention on the civil aspects of international child abduction, which provides for an “internationally agreed mechanism for dealing with the global phenomenon of child abduction”, said judge Maletsatsi Mahalelo in her judgment.
She referred to an earlier Constitutional Court decision saying one of its purposes was “to ensure that custody issues are determined by the court in the best position to do so by reason of the relationship between its jurisdiction and the child”.
In her order, Mahalelo said a German family court could vary the order, but for now the children must be returned to Germany as it was their country of habitual residence. The court refused Zimba leave to appeal.
“The court did not consider my concerns, the rightful home of myself and the girls,” Zimba said. “I have always understood and believed in the importance of family. As a woman it is inevitable that your career will have to take a step back to start a family. My sacrifices gave me the opportunity to be a mother to my beautiful girls. For me to have my babies, it was worth it.
Commenting on the breakdown of her marriage, Zimba said “there were many red flags from the beginning”.
“I knew that the marriage and partnership were no longer aligned. I factored in all the unfortunate events that occurred and the example I was setting for my girls. How could I expect to have a happy and valuable life if I continued to allow myself to be devalued and underappreciated?”
The couple’s divorce is not yet final, and Zimba will have to return to Germany to finalise it.
Zimba’s supporters have taken to social media to express their solidarity with the actress. Women For Change, a local organisation that fights for women’s rights, has thrown its weight behind her.
“We stand with Denise Zimba in her fight for justice,” the organisation said in a statement. “The court’s decision is a clear example of the systemic bias that women face in our justice system. We will continue to support Denise in her quest for fairness and equality.”
Zimba said she was grateful for the outpouring of support from her fans and other women.
“Many women stay in marriages because they are afraid and feel powerless and trapped. Many are afraid to speak up and choose to endure the pain rather than the possibility of losing their children and stability. I understand it all completely, I am in it.”
She is determined to keep fighting for the custody of her children.
“Every child needs their mother, especially at such a young age. Not even the German government would favour any child to be stripped from their mother, it’s unheard of, unless in cases where the mother is not fit to care for her children.
“I will always choose my children, and am doing so regardless of the unfortunate ruling. They are still my babies and I intend to commit my life to ensure they have the best, and I will be right there beside them cheering them on. My life, my career can wait, my girls come first.”
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