Chemists across the country have reported a drastic drop in over-the-counter sales of medication for depression.
The queues to the self-prescription desks at different outlets that used to rival snaking lines outside voting stations during election time have disappeared like dew at the slightest sight of sunrays.
The country is enveloped in a gold and black frenzy. Excitement around the republic has reached fever pitch. From Dainfern to Durban, Sandton to Standerton, Kakamas to Katlehong, Caluza to Cofimvaba, life has never been better for the disciples of Mount Naturena.
Kaizer Chiefs fans are more excited than a mosquito in a nudist colony. They are telling anyone within earshot that they are in the mood to make short shrift of anything that stands in their way to being delivered to the promised land by their messiah Nasreddine Nabi.
They are in corrective mode but aren’t taking a short left to the “Sun City” correctional service facility standing a stone’s throw from Lena Road. Besides the fact that there was no two pot system when Chiefs last ascended the podium as champions of anything, let alone the Premiership, for some among the army of Amakhosi faithful it’s a fait accompli that the title is theirs. This on the strength of beating only Marumo Gallants and AmaZulu.
The joy has brought with it pain. Poor sods can’t even celebrate their predestined fate in peace. They’ve become victims of their own success now that they are beset with unexpected consequences that come with their newfound lease of life. One of those is believing that your own shadow is chasing you.
Bouts of sky-high paranoia have set in. It manifests in Chiefs supporters being followed by unknown people. The horrific hallucinations also see them complaining that unregistered cars are following them.
Wonderful happenings have befallen the country with this change in fortunes for Chiefs. Reserve Bank governor Lesetja Kganyago announced a 25-basis point cut in the country’s repurchase rate. The price of petrol has decreased. Diesel has dropped.
Production levels in workplaces have increased with managers overburdened by requests of employees volunteering to work overtime without pay. Editors are gaining weight, their permanent grumpiness replaced by ear-to-ear grins — you’d swear they are auditioning for toothpaste adverts.
On the weird side, we’ve had snow in the middle of spring. The busy N3 artery was blocked by unusually thick snow. In the blink of an eye tropical KwaZulu-Natal and the Eastern Cape saw ski resorts mushrooming overnight. Snowboarding and skiing down Van Reenen’s Pass. It must surely mean Chiefs will win the league, no?
But until you’ve won the Betway Premiership title you mustn’t start thinking that you’re a champion
But until you’ve won the Betway Premiership title you mustn’t start thinking that you’re a champion. Sundowns will know better because they’ve done it so many times that it has become clockwork and predictable. You can bet on Chiefs not being the doormat of all and sundry and shamelessly taking a beating.
Yes, the marauding mean machine from Marabastad left FNB Stadium the victors yesterday and served a reality check. But Chiefs were not vanquished in the humiliating fashion they were at the same venue last May. There’s still a bark in this old dog. All it needs is to regain its bite. The local game will be better for it.
The Khosi gang is back with a bang and will not pipe down. You would be forgiven for thinking that were all swallowed up by the thousand graves dug up by the Gauteng government during the pandemonium of the Covid-19 pandemic. Their spirit must not be dampened. Their buzz adds a feelgood factor.
From Bloemfontein to Durban to Johannesburg, all the three league encounters they’ve engaged in have been all sold affairs. The sold-out signs go up at the mere sight of a branded Chiefs van. Amakhosi ajabulile, long may it continue. It’s a great drug for the mood of the people of the south.
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